The Wannabe Cowboy

 "Hey what is with your beard?" was my bitter better half's reaction, my nonagenarian Dad admonished,"Just because you have retired doesn't mean you can move around in such a slovenly manner, go shave." I have yet to  recover from these barbs, here I was trying to ace my Clint Eastwood look, a childhood icon. I mean honestly who in our generation doesn't recall "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly" and its unforgettable signature tune. As it is, the cowboy movies were always such a rage with us, the Gunfight at OK Corral variety and Country music like that of Kenny Rogers and Don Williams. What attracted me were the  "stetson hats" and these hats didn't just fit in with the clean shaven chins, a rugged unshaven look was a prerequisite to carry this persona. Alas, in uniform, it remained a dream unfulfilled, where each morning the razor dutifully struck the night stubble with vengeance removing any and every trace, down to the roots of that tiny little sprout which dared to make an appearance. Some credit must go to the perseverance of these follicles too, for years they have been literally nipped in the bud, but they don't give up or give in, just keep at it. I wonder if it is hope which keeps them alive or they have simply resigned themselves to their fate like the poor chick which knows its eggs are destined to reach the breakfast table in the form of omelettes only.

So here I was, a veteran of 38 years in uniform with an additional four years   in  training academies, where too, we had to perforce subject our chins to this unmitigated torture daily, without a break. As a kind hearted soul that I am, I took pity on my chin and also on these strands which stand out like the much abused "parali" (left over stubble after harvesting in a field), waiting to be executed yet again. But this world does not believe in such harmless acts, where we are essentially providing some much needed relief to our own face, letting it be as it was ordained to be, by the Almighty himself. I am sure "beard" itself would have demanded a special status as none objected to the hair on the upper lip, which could be twirled  proudly as moustaches. Just imagine, merely a pair of lips away, such discrimination, high time the Supreme Court took suo  moto notice and issued directives and prevent this   unceremonious butchering. No wonder, the beard has got its vengeance, with the young generation of kids going with the bearded look, taking a cue from their Cricket stars like Kohli, Rahul, Rohit et al, for a change, the youth have forsaken the clean shaven Shahrukh, Amir, Saif, Akshay, Sunny look totally. 

So here I was in an act of rebellion, trying to stand shoulder to shoulder or should I say beard to beard in an act of solidarity with our 'Gen Zee'. Yes there were more grey than black in the salt and pepper growth of mine but, finally I had broken the shackles of razors, blades, shaving gels and after shave lotions. I was loving my look, donned the stetson a dozen times, stood in front of the mirror admiring what the mirror on the wall reflected. It took almost ten days or may be twelve, to get into this avatar  of mine, but there was one major problem, the damn thing was always itching, I applied oils, creams but they only provided temporary relief. Now looks are deadly but then this came at this unwanted cost where one was always trying to provide some relief from the discomfort. Looking for a way out of this self inflicted torture, I decided to give in and revert to the same old myself but naturally I did it as a favour to my better half, that I had heeded to her call much against my wishes and had sacrificed my Cowboy dreams. Sorry  Cowboy.. time for you to stay in vivid imaginations only as of now......except that I have put this photo on the book cover, where it shall stay forever.

 

OPERATION SINDOOR : TECHNICAL KNOCK OUT OR STALEMATE

“Chickens have come home to roost”, it is payback time for Pakistan, having indulged in terrorism as a statecraft and mastered the art of doublespeak, this time around they have bitten more than they can chew. The serene and gentle plains of Pahalgam  were bloodied in the mindless communal massacre, thus provoking the Indians to retaliate in the similar form as on previous occasions in Uri and Pulwama. But the tragedy of such a script is that it is written by both the sides and India has outgrown the self imposed cautious restraint. Today with the tag of world’s fastest growing economy which stands as the fourth largest in terms of GDP, Indian Govt has the wherewithal to tackle Pakistan in all the domains, be it military, economic or diplomatic which has been demonstrated in the last three days.

India has set itself a very clear mandate that the terrorist infrastructure must be targeted relentlessly and since there are no terrorist camps here, Pak has decided to up the ante by targeting civilians and military targets.

This has provided India the opportunity to target certain military targets as well. The fact that India thwarted all Pak attempts of retaliation by drones and missiles effectively with its S400 AD system, aptly named Sudarshan Chakra, should serve as a lesson to Pak military not to unnecessarily indulge in adventurism and push their nation towards disintegration.

The chronology of events which commenced with the speech by Pak Chief of Army Staff Gen Asim Munir to overseas Pakistanis was a clear indication of his nefarious designs. It is also widely known that he is a highly unpopular leader both in the Pak Army as also with the civilians. In order to shore up his reputation and to divert the attention of the masses, he has followed the same old path which his predecessors have been following. The bogey of India and Hindus has been known to work in their country which was born out of hatred for Hindus only. 

Pak army has always been dominated by the Punjabi Mussalman with the other ethnicities playing the second and third fiddle. At the time of partition, and for the first two odd decades their army still retained the ethos of the old British Indian Army and were free from religious dogmas. ZIa ul Haque, the Pak dictator who hanged Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto in 1978 after overthrowing his democratically elected Govt was the first one to seek the support of the mullah lobby. As luck would have, the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan also occurred at the same time and the Americans got the opportunity they were waiting for. Pak provided them the bases, training camps for the mujahideen, the Americans chipped in with cash and military hardware as also trained this ragtag force into fierce fighters. While all this was going on, Pak Army slowly and gradually started to get more and more Islamic in their approach and conduct. So much so that the militant mujahideen became a strategic asset of the army itself and were integrated into their tactical doctrines. It worked well initially as these terrorists were then diverted towards arch enemy India to execute their philosophy of ‘bleeding by thousand cuts’. Unfortunately they did not take into account the resilience and grit of our nation and the inherent strength of the institutions here.

OPERATION SINDOOR is thus not in isolation, it is an ongoing process where Pak frustration at the normalisation of conditions in Kashmir Valley, the economic stability and growth of this strife torn part had to be challenged. The message in Pahalgam was crystal clear, take the bait and walk into their well laid out ambush. Pak is supposed to have mastered the art of ‘cultivated irrationality’, and this was another example where with the nuclear overhang, any major conventional operation by India could invite a nuclear response by Pak. Perception management is a very crucial part of international diplomacy and statecraft, where Pak has been a past master and a tit for tat response can always be addressed by their own narratives. Modi Govt has called his  nuclear bluff on last two occasions also and this time gone ahead and carried out precision strikes with ample proof for the world to see and take note. 

Pakistan was bound to retaliate but their response was found wanting and effectively neutralised by Indian Armed Forces. The current situation is still developing, however international diplomacy has already swung into action. It appears that the Americans push to get India and Pak to cease hostilities has borne fruit, as both the nations had not declared themselves formally at war. This window needs to be exploited as lessons have been driven home. A war will be devastating for Pak but even Indian economy too will suffer in the bargain. Some sanity seems to have been driven into Pak, which is evident by the ceasefire declared. While analysts can continue to debate as to how this was brought about, could be IMF loan, could be a strict push by the Americans or may be even the losses suffered and its inability to carry on much longer, but it’s more than welcome. Let us hope for the best! 

EK CHUTKI SINDOOR KI KEEMAT

OPERATION SINDOOR, what an apt name for an unprecedented operation, its symbolism was not lost on anyone when two lady officers, of the Indian Armed Forces, one a Muslim and the other a Hindu,  accompanied the External Affairs Secretary for the press briefing, after the execution of the precision strikes by India on Pak terror camps and headquarters in Pak Occupied Kashmir as also in Pak Punjab. We all have heard and watched the electronic media describing the actual operation and its endless analysis, where most of the experts have elaborated on this act as one of retribution or 'badla'. More on this aspect of 'revenge' later. But first we need to focus on the significance of this 'vermillion', which is such an integral part of our culture. It is not a mere coloured powder, it is a sign of the rich tradition of unwavering commitment to the betrothed, not just for one, but multiple lives.

Married women adorn themselves with Sindoor is common knowledge, the practice dates back to Ramayana  days, when Mata Sita put it to please Bhagwan Ram, watching this Hanuman ji, covered his whole body with vermillion goes the folklore. Idols of Hanuman ji even today is thus covered with vermillion and its application on the forehead is considered very auspicious. Although the feminists have been up in arms against this practice as an archaic tradition, signifying a lower status of women in society, but on the contrary, vermillion is  a source of  love, energy, devotion, integrity and strength. So much so that Bengali women celebrate Vijayadashami with 'Sindur Khela', while bidding farewell to Ma Durga after  the Durga Pooja festivities.  The terrorists and their backers did not realise the strength of this "chutki of sindoor"; obviously they haven't read about Savitri, who took on Yamraj himself for the sake of her sindoor and forced him to give in and grant Satyavan, her husband the boon of life.

Now getting back to avenging the dastardly communal terrorist act of killing 26 men duly identifying their religious denomination, the fact that they reportedly told the ladies to inform the PM about this act, was throwing an open challenge to our nation. India had to payback as the 26/11 Mumbai attack days are well behind us, as demonstrated by surgical strikes post Uri attacks and Balakot air strikes post Pulwama. With the  traditional vermillion tilak on their forehead, and the blessing of “Vijayi bhav” (May victory be yours!), the Armed Forces under the able guidance of the Prime Minister have taken it upon themselves to teach the errant Pakis a lesson for life. Don't mess with sindoor, it will wipe you and your country from the face of this earth. Our Western neighbour is notorious for not honouring any of their commitments which they have made, and they are known to lie through their teeth right since their inception. No wonder they don’t understand that for us Indians our word carries a lot of meaning. We believe in ‘Universal Brotherhood’, but also carry a big stick, when someone refuses to honour his side of the commitment. The nefarious designs of sowing seeds of discord amongst the communities by targeting only Hindus is not going to work, as since times immemorial, the inherent secular culture of our nation  is our biggest strength, it is a bond as strong as that of Sindoor. So watch out...

PAHALGAM

PAHALGAM 

Pahalgam, “mini Switzerland” in the pristine Kashmir Valley has always been a favourite with the tourists, also an ideal locale for film shootings. With the onset of Summers, tourists were thronging the Kashmir Valley in thousands, enjoying the fruits of normalisation of situation, post abrogation of Article 370. As a consequence, complacency tends to set in, we had to pay a vey heavy  price of this security lapse. 28 precious lives snuffed out brutally, the perpetrators making it a point to confirm the religious identity of the victim before shooting him.

As a first step, diplomatic actions have been initiated, suspension of Indus Water Treaty being the principal one amongst them. It is a contentious issue with many analysts asking the pertinent question that in the absence of any water storage infrastructure, is it merely tokenism or is there some tangible gain expected to accrue from this action. We have to trust our leaders that they must have also debated this before announcing these actions. What next? 

The dilemma which Indian Govt is faced with right now is, what will be the befitting response to the terror attack in Pahalgam, as Balakot type air strikes or surgical strike post Uri are practically ruled out. The reason is obvious, surprise is the major factor at play in such actions and our neighbour is expecting us and is ready with his arsenal in place. Modi ji has sprung surprises and the Armed Forces played their role to perfection inflicting serious damage to the terrorist camps, keeping the threshold below a full scale war. Armchair analysts sitting in air-conditioned studios wage their own brand of warfare on a daily basis, but wars are fought with a purpose, keeping an end state in mind and India would do well not to  get sucked into a Russia-Ukraine kind of abyss. But that does not mean punitive action should not be taken, and I am sure that kinetic action will follow and will not be on predictable lines.

We as citizens also have a role to play, instead of venting our impotent rage on social media platforms, can we form groups comprising not just hundreds, not just thousands but in lakhs cutting across religious lines, march into the Valley with Muslim brothers leading the charge. Simply swamp the terrorists, their sympathisers, overwhelm them, spread out into the valley every nook and corner, take your vehicles, hire transport, be self sufficient. Strength is in our numbers, and don’t you forget, if we are 100 of us and four of these terrorists confront us, we can charge on them, they can kill may be five or injure another couple but ultimately they will be scared and will run away, chase them. Prove it to the world that we can’t be scared by these cowards. 

I know this sounds radical, but the message goes home to their backers that we can’t afford to fool around any longer. This attack is not just on tourists, it is against the idea of India and we Indians  will leave no stone unturned to protect not just this idea but also our people and our boundaries.

UNSOLVED MYSTERIES

UNSOLVED MYSTERIES

 "Bermuda Triangle",  also known as 'Devil's Triangle' the name itself is shrouded in mystery. Most of us recall this piece of geography in the North Atlantic Ocean bounded by Bermuda, Florida and Puerto Rico which had gained notoriety for reported disappearance of ships, aircrafts and people without any trace. While all kinds of theories have been propounded some as outlandish as this being the gateway to another dimension or that Aliens were somehow responsible for these acts. The reader must be at a loss as to why this 'kolaveri di' on such an obscure place which is so far removed from the current mess which the world finds itself in. There are no mysteries here, we all know where our money has vanished in the Tariff War, but there are some articles in our household which have displayed similar traits of disappearance without any trace. 

Before you go ahead, a statutory warning is mandatory as we are going into uncharted territories here at our own risk. So here goes, the first in the list  is the ubiquitous 'safety pin', which has been the saviour of many a damsel in distress. Many wardrobe malfunctions have been prevented from occurrence due the strength which these pins have displayed. Since it is such a handy accessory to have, its absence is almost catastrophic and can potentially lead to some tantrums on a lower end of the scale to a mini earthquake of sorts with the dressing tables and wardrobes bearing the  brunt. Safety pins are bought by the dozens or may be even scores but somehow magically they evaporate into thin air in due course. A distant cousin of safety pin is the ‘hair pin’, which also

displays similar traits, as they save the beauties many a blushes by tucking in the lustrous locks  at appropriate places. These too are procured in bulk and are observed to be lying idly by the bedside, on the dresser, in the rest rooms, on the basins, in the purses and the vanity boxes but suddenly one fine day they all do the Houdini act landing the lasses in a lurch.

While these two articles are part of the personal dressing of  the dames but there is yet another

thing which concern the ladies more but we all are equally effected. The clothespin clip, an item which keeps the clothes on the clothesline and prevents them from flying away or falling from grace into the dirt and grime on the floor. In fact in the metros, it is the balconies where all the clothes are hung to dry and without these pins some items can land scandalously in the balconies of lower floor occupant’s premises. This falling down  will result in a fall out of unimaginable proportions. 

Unsolved mysteries like the Bermuda Triangle or the case of missing safety pins, hair pins or the clothesline clips I bet is beyond the legendary Sherlock Holmes or Hercule Poirot. 

You must be wondering what has got into me that I have started delving into the household stuff, well suffice to say that I am a retired person with plenty of time at hand, running errands, one of these is self  inflicted, trying to collect the elusive clothesline clips. I know I have barely touched the tip of the iceberg here, readers will add to this list and will look forward to the additions in the comments.

Waqf

 

Waqf is the bone of contention these days, as we all know, it is an Urdu word and by now we also know that it refers to property donated for charity, dedicated to Allah, thus ensuring that it can't be sold or purchased or even transferred for personal gain. I know I am treading on dangerous territory here, but I hope my nonsense may just make some sense to the reader. So here goes, most of the people of mine and older generation have heard of Acharya Vinoba Bhave, Gandhiji's famous disciple, who embarked on a very noble mission of getting land to be donated by the landlords (zamindars) to be distributed to the landless. In today's age this seems like a harebrained idea, but surprise of surprises, post independence India was still under  influence of Gandhian utopian philosophy and Gandhi's disciples were venerated. More so as he had no personal or political ambitions, he was solely dedicated to social work. So he was  hugely successful in appealing to the landed gentry, the erstwhile rulers to be magnanimous  and as a result got lakhs of acres of land parcels all across India from Pochampally in Andhra to Ramgarh in Rajasthan which he dutifully distributed to the landless for agricultural subsistence. The movement petered out by 1960, as the idealism began to fade.

I am sure you are wondering why am I referring to this saint and what has he got to do with Waqf per se, well not directly but imagine there was a time when people donated land and today, it is the most precious possession with anyone.He would often say, "Sabai bhoomi Gopal Ki " ( All the land belongs to the Almighty). We are mere tenants on this planet, the land obviously is His, by whichever name you may like to address Him. To that extent, Waqf Board is right when they lay any claim on any piece of land, but then I am not so sure that any particular religion can lay exclusive claim on it. 

While there are many clauses in the proposed amendment of the Act, the primary reason is the land holdings and claims only, the other issues can be addressed. But that should not come as a surprise as our courts are literally flooded with land related civil suits and lakhs of cases are pending before the lordships. It is common knowledge that Railways, Defence and Waqf Board are the three largest holders of land in the country. Politicians over the years have been eyeing this for its huge monetising potential and there are encroachments galore with the connivance of the authorities. Naturally all three entities have been making an effort to zealously guard their possessions. While the first two are controlled by the Govt of the day, the third one enjoys freedom from any such restrictions, it is here that the govt wants to have some semblance of influence. The contention that no other religion enjoys any such patronage at such a large scale is also true, so to that extent it is discriminatory in nature. Will the govt be happy if similar provisions were incorporated for all the religions as separate boards, I am sure the answer will be in the negative. It would rather have no such entity but then in our multi religious multi-cultural heterogenous society one has to make exceptions bowing to sentiments of the populace within the laid down boundaries.

I am sure better sense will prevail on both the sides, where common ground can be found rather than head towards a clash. It would be prudent for the politicians of all hues to remember the greater cause rather then inflame the emotions. I can only say that we need to tread cautiously...

IT'S THE MONEY(MINERALS) STUPID

  

Going to the White House without a Tuxedo, now that’s an unpardonable offence, so friend Zelensky had this coming. I wonder what would have happened if it was Mahatma Gandhi  visiting the White House, dressed in his trademark loin cloth, the American media and the POTUS himself would have probably fainted at this horrendous act. Gandhiji when invited for a Tea party to the Buckingham Palace in 1931, went in the same attire. A journalist asked him about the adequacy of his dress for the occasion, he responded tongue in cheek that the King was wearing more than enough for both of them together. Friend Zelensky, off course did not get an opportunity to even clarify, such was the gravity of the offence committed.

I am not too sure whether any specific dress code is mentioned for such invites, there must be, as even in the Army, we ourselves are sticklers about sticking to the prescribed dress for the occasion. But as I gather the offence was taken on the attire as also from where was it procured, supposedly on Temu which is a Chinese e-commerce App akin to Amazon. Had it been from Amazon, probably Zelensky would have been spared the blushes.

I am sure you recall the childhood story of the ‘Emperor’s New Clothes’, to refresh your grey cells which have started to wither due to overuse of social media platforms, the story goes that the king was fond of new and fancy clothes. Once two conmen claimed that they had weaved an invisible cloth for him, which was unique and could not be perceived by the stupid or incompetent. Sure enough the king marched to his royal court through his capital adorned in this invisible cloak, where none of the courtiers had the guts to call out, till a child said what was visible to everyone, that the King had no clothes on, but none wanted to look like a fool. All that Zelensky was required to have claimed that his tuxedo is not visible to the oafs and the tables could have been turned. Instead he started to justify this act of his in the name of his patriotic duty to align himself to his countrymen who are in a state of war. 

Wars are profitable business, as everyone knows, except for the common people who suffer, but to businessmen it’s a huge opportunity and that is exactly what was visible to the the POTUS and his coterie. Friend Zelensky had not bargained for this unceremonious rebuke, as ever since the war broke out he was being hailed as a modern day Churchill against the might of the Russian Bear. Having been led up the garden path so far, this reality check was such a rude shock now that he was left holding the baby. I am sure he is on the lookout for the best fashion designer to fit him into his Sunday best for his next outing when he returns ready to sign on the dotted line. You guessed it, it is the money (minerals) stupid!