Horses for Courses

In India wedding processions are invariably led by the groom on a horseback, with the rest of the baraatis (groom's relatives and friends)  following. Some dancing away in gay abandon to the tunes of the band which plays catchy filmy music tunes or sometimes even worse accompanied by a crooner who is generally out of tune and too loud. I often wonder if horses could think and speak for themselves, they would probably be pondering over the specimens whom they have carried on their backs for the marriage ceremony. Interestingly, these horses are tamed to such an extent that they are not disturbed by the sound of crackers bursting, loud music blaring, and baraatis getting dangerously close to their hind legs, which in normal course would have precipitated a reflex where they would have just sent them packing with a royal kick in the rear. Indian baraats  are special and needs a detailed description some other time. Let us stick to the horses for now.

Horses for courses implies the a race horse is not suitable in certain race courses or in other words  we must select the right kind for the job at hand. So we have race horses bred in the best of stud farms with the right pedigree,  then we have the Polo ponies, known for their agility, the Equestrian horses, these are the “haves” in the world of steeds and the “have nots” are the ones employed for menial jobs such as Tongas and Baraats etc. In the tester years we had the Cavalry the mounted arm,  incidentally, President’s Body Guard is the only surviving ceremonial Cavalry in the world today. Horses too have the wild cousins who are untamed and roam the countryside as the masters of their own destiny. Ladakh has the Zaniskari ponies which are found in the wild.  But they are exceptions as horses were domesticated some 6000 years ago. Taming of wild horses would definitely bear similarities with the taming of cadets in the training academies, after all we too were regimented curbing our natural instincts.

In Indian Military Academy, Dehradun, during our Passing Out Parade (POP), the Adjutant is mounted on an elegant charger accompanying the Parade. I still recall in the summer of 1987, in sweltering heat, during one of our practice sessions, the Adjutant, Lt Col Reddy from the Gorkhas, once in his rare benevolent moods, regaled us with this joke, "His horse would often whisper into his ear that he has been performing his duties diligently for over a decade now and he had heard the Adjutant addressing the Gentlemen Cadets(GC) every POP. Every time the Adjutant would say that even an ass who passes through these hallowed portal of Chetwode becomes an officer in the Indian Army. He has been waiting that some day, his turn too will come after all he was a stallion notches above the asses when Adjutant would follow the GCs into the Chetwode and he too would become an Officer. The GCs were in splits and supercharged after this, and resulted in yet another perfect display of immaculate discipline and drill by the would be officers.

While in NDA, equestrian was compulsory and was part of the curriculum. I think most of us novices were very excited at the prospect of getting to ride, after all, we had all seen Bollywood movies where the heroes would come galloping on horses and sweep their heartthrobs of their feet literally. Folklore has it that King Prithviraj Chauhan eloped with his beloved Sanyogita in a similar fashion. The Army, fortunately believes in inculcating the right ethos, and thus the first lesson is on familiarisation with the horses, getting to know them, and learning to feed them. After the ride, a pat on the mane with "Shabaash Ghoda" is also mandatory, even if the colt in question decided to be more of a mule and refused to obey your commands. After a couple of lessons in the Equestrian Lines, where we learned to walk and trot the horse, it was finally time to move out into the open for some galloping. This was the moment we all were waiting for, imagining ourselves as the knights in shining armour in pursuits of our damsels in distress. That fateful day the Riding Instructor was a little peeved with me, and decided to assign Senapati, a  tall broad stallion for the ride. Senapati was notorious for treating the novices with disdain and would throw all kinds of tantrums, buck and then throw the rider off, putting them in their place. While the instructor had asked us to graduate from the trot to a gentle canter and only then gallop, but Senapati had his own mind.I wasn't aware of his reputation, so unsuspecting I took off, sure enough I was just a Johnny come lately and deserved the buck treatment. So first my feet went out of the stirrups, reins still in my hand, then the bucking began and I was off the saddle but not one to give up so easily, I held on to his neck for my dear life. My Bollywood fantasises were coming alive, the hero being chased by the villain and hero ducking to avoid the shower of bullets by adopting all kinds of tricks. The drama continued for a while, I could hear the instructor screaming behind, asking me to control Senapati. Finally I managed get hold of the reins and got him to halt, or may be he was just a little tired and wanted to take a breather, I immediately dismounted successfully meeting the challenge without a scratch. Though I learnt my lessons, and thereafter stayed on the right side of the riding instructors rather than risk being taken for a ride....